Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Last few moments of 2014...

I remembered that last year I promised myself that I would write a good story for myself this year. I said that I would make it count. I wanted a year that I wouldn't regret looking back on. Well, a year had passed. Had it been good? Did it count? Had I been a good teacher? A good colleague? A caring and reliable friend? Was there anything that I could have done to make it better? Of course there was... there always will be... because perfection is unattainable...

Looking through my past fb posts, it would seemed that my year had been pretty awesome..  punctuated with challenging and great trips, with wonderful students, fun colleagues, great friends and supportive family members... but yet, as the year drew to an end, there is this unexplainable void inside of me..

Maybe it's the melancholy caused by knowing that yet another year has past and would never return... the stubborn feeling that such a great year should not end on such a quiet note... the reluctance to release my hold on what had been a wonderful year...

I wonder what 2015 holds for me... More exciting adventures? More challenges? More happiness? So many changes awaits... new level to teach, new responsibilities... Whatever it is, I shall try my best to stay positive and shall JIAYOUS!!! I will write a good story for myself next year too... :))

Some great memories to end the year with...

 A lovely msg from a parent tt brightened up my day... Rly thankful for parents like these...

 — feeling thankful.

Wednesday, October 08, 2014

As of 13th June 2014, another item was struck off my list... :D Although I didn't manage to reach the summit of Mount K, I DID climb it, and it was a pretty awesome experience. :)

Thinking of modifying the items abit though, cuz some of the items don't seem to appeal to me as much anymore... :X


1. complete 21K (done!)
2. complete 42K
3. go scuba diving (done!)
4. go skydiving (done!)
5. climb Mount Kinabalu (done!)
6. learn a new instrument (Ukelele/ guitar) (done!)
7. bungee jumping
8. dive with whale sharks
9. travel alone

Thursday, January 02, 2014

Step 2:
Next, sprinkle the glitter into the jar (be generous, otherwise the effect may not be as magical.. :p) and add water until it overflows slightly (to reduce the amount of air bubbles in your snow globe). Add glycerin (helps to slow down the movement of the glitter) then insert the cover carefully into the jar and tighten it.






Optional step:
You can then tie some decorative ribbons around the lid or put them into pretty boxes (can be bought at Daiso) and tada! Gorgeous aren't they?! I was really amazed at how well it turned out!!








First day of school in 2014. It went well. :) Had a meeting with my Maths project members and can really start to see it unfolding in front of me.. originally was still very 纸上谈兵... but it seems to be taking form the more we discuss. Maybe this year we will be able to nominate ourselves for the staff innovation awards or sth... :p

I have missed my students. Glad to see them back again. New year, new responsibilities and maybe new happiness. :)

Wednesday, January 01, 2014

First day of 2014.

Time for some serious reflection. I haven't really blogged a lot in 2013. Busy. Lazy. Writer's block. Too much emotions to be sorted out. Nothing to write. Different reasons. Or rather, now that I look back, I realised that they were just different excuses. I could have written if I wanted to. If I had simply pulled out the slightest bit of self-discipline. I could have. But I didn't. And I guess it is still okay. Okay that I blog now only when I really want to document things that I don't want to forget. Okay that I am writing for different reasons. Okay that I have decided not to feel obligated if I don't want to blog.

2013.
Went places. Anilao. Gardens by the bay. Adventure cove. Staycation. Brother's POP. Cruise. Phuket. Cameron Highlands. Lombok. Musicals. Addams Family. Notre Dame de Paris. Othello. 搭错车. Bought a guitar.

Fell in love/ crush/ infatuation/ whatever you want to call that. Got attached. Broke up. Despite my brave front, I was affected.  Not exactly by the guy, but by my own ineptitude at maintaining a relationship. Felt inadequate. Felt lousy. Felt hurt. But I knew that I was just being silly and I tried really hard to get over it. It really wasn't anybody's fault. He was a nice guy. Just not mine. And I was happy. Just not in love.

2014.
Places I want to go. Tioman. Mt K. Taiwan. NZ.

Learn guitar. Write more frequently. Exercise more. No more lifts until after Mt K. Go hiking up Bukit Timah. Be more organised. Be more understanding. Love.

My story for 2014 is only just beginning. I am going to make it count. :)

Friday, November 01, 2013

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Was affirmed by a parent of my student today... She wrote an email to commend me to my P and level head... And forwarded the email to me as well... Really really touched and happy that my efforts in class have once again been noticed and appreciated.. Thou truth be told, I really had a much easier time with my current class as compared to the other teachers... No matter what class I am teaching, I have made a difference... And tt matters alot to me... :)

This was what she wrote:

My child, XXX is in P3 this year and I would like to take the opportunity to commend two teachers in particular - Miss Cheryl Lee and Mr Ho (science). XXX shared with me on occasion the interesting science and maths nuggets he learnt. I am impressed with the dedication and zeal shown by these teachers. Once XXX told Miss Lee he is reading storybooks from a series, she made the effort to provide him with a link to further books on this series (NLB does not have the full set), so he can complete his reading. I was really touched by the extra step she took. Also my son does not attend kumon or cma and his computation skills are not as developed. Ms Lee shared with them a nifty multiplication method that they can use to get the answer. I learnt something new that I pass to my other friends.  Teachers like them really make me gratified and proud that my kids are in HWS. I think Mr Ho is an adjunct teacher. I  sorry but I do not understand that term  I just hope that he will continue to be in hws and to impart good knowledge to hws kids for years to come. Please keep up the good work.

Yes, I will keep trying.. And hopefully will continue to touch lives along the way... :))) so so so so so happy!!! Weeeeee~!!!

Monday, September 09, 2013

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I am actually terrified out of my wits... it's one thing to go gallivanting across the seas with ppl that you know and feel safe with... and yet another to go into the ocean with ppl whom you have never met or just have a passing acquaintance... I feel really out of my depth.. and I really wonder how do ppl do it... backpacking across the countries... that really requires quite a substantial amount of courage now doesn't it?

"Heart don't fail me now,
Courage don't desert me.
Don't turn back now that we're here.
People always say:
"Life is full of choices"
No one ever mentions fear."

I'm off on an adventure!
One which I believe I would grow from and learn loads from...
Be brave!

Tuesday, April 09, 2013

Was recently introduced this book "Paper Towns"by John Green (credits to May for the introduction :P)... was quite intrigued by the title, and so, on a day when I was supposed to be clearing up my marking, like the master of procrastination that I am, I sat on my bed. And read. And read. And read.. And before I knew it, I had reached the last page of the book, and 3 hours had flown by... never to return..

It was quite an interesting read.. and here are some extracts to share... somehow, not surprisingly, I felt that the parts which touched me the most plays upon the theme of acceptance...

"You keep expecting people not to be themselves. I mean, I could hate you for being massively unpunctual and for never being interested in anything other than Margo Roth Spiegelman, and for, like, never asking me about how it’s going with my girlfriend—but I don’t give a shit, man, because you’re you. My parents have a shit ton of black Santas, but that’s okay. They’re them. I’m too obsessed with a reference Web site to answer my phone sometimes when my friends call, or my girlfriend. That’s okay, too. That’s me. You like me anyway. And I like you. You’re funny, and you’re smart, and you may show up late, but you always show up eventually.”

Don't we all fall just too easily into this trap of egocentrism.. of expecting the whole world to revolve around us, only to be upset when we realise that it doesn't.. and yet we never seem to learn from our mistakes, and expect the people around us to time and again cater to our whims and fancies.. why not focus on the more positive aspects of the situation? Like what the character says, "you may show up late, but you always show up eventually"... instead of getting pissed at a friend who turns up late, be glad that he/she turns up at all.. instead of being upset over a difference in opinion, be glad that at least someone is being sincere enough to share that difference... if you want to be with a person, be it a friend, a family or a significant other, acceptance of both virtues and flaws are essential.. they come as a package... if you find that you cannot accept, then perhaps, the best thing to do is to leave... before it becomes too painful to do so...

"I’m just saying that it was easy for me to like Lacey before. It’s easy to like someone from a distance. But when she stopped being this amazing unattainable thing or whatever, and started being, like, just a regular girl with a weird relationship with food and frequent crankiness who’s kinda bossy—then I had to basically start liking a whole different person.”

Every picture/ painting looks wonderful when you frame it up and place it upon a pedestal... until one day, when you look too closely, you see the creases in the artwork, you see the pixels in the photograph... When that happens, you can choose to take a step back and not look too closely, or learn to love the pixels/ creases that make the art... that applies too... to relationships...

“You had been a paper boy to me all these years—two dimensions as a character on the page and two different, but still flat, dimensions as a person. But that night you turned out to be real. And it ends up being so odd and fun and magical that I go back to my room in the morning and I just  miss  you."

Just a really sad and awwwww moment...

it's like when you treat people like puppets on a string, when you hurt them without a second thought with your actions... and one day, you realised that you couldn't live without them...

yet it's also like Cinderella returning from the ball and finding that her glass slipper was still intact and that the love of her life was no longer a fictitious character...

"Forever - is composed of nows"

A quote from a poem by Emily Dickinson, that was cited in the book..

You can't have a forever if you do not piece together the nows which will pave your happily ever after isn't it?

Effort, not attraction, is what makes a relationship lasts...

Friday, March 29, 2013

after what seemed like ages, I'm finally back to blog.. for the past few months, too frequently I have switched on my computer, logged onto blogger, stared at the empty page for a while then logged off again... it's not that I don't have anything else to share anymore, but rather, I am starting to feel that I am no longer capable of posting entries that are actually worth reading. My mind misses the stimulation it used to have back in Uni days, and I'm just not as satisfied with my posts as I used to be..

Maybe I haven been putting aside enough time for metacognition.. not enough time for "me"...

Either way, when I found out that my vball was cancelled due to some miscommunication on the admin side, I'm proud to say that instead of just feeling upset and staying at home blaming the whole world (as I am prone to do.. lol), I pushed aside my negative feelings and made myself go for a run.. not a very long one, as my stamina is totally non-existent and I am super out of practise.. I haven't been running in ages too.. and I gotta get back into shape so that I don't drag my teammates down.. :x

Ran from my house to Novena (according to my brother, it's only about a 20min run).. but it was a good start nonetheless.. and halfway through, when I was starting to feel a stitch coming up my side, an abstract from C.S. Lewis "The horse and his boy" came into my mind...

“P- please ,” said Hwin, very shyly, “I feel just like Bree that I can’t go on. But when Horses have humans (with spurs and things) on their backs, aren’t they often made to go on when they’re feeling like this? and then they find they can. I m-mean - oughtn’t we to be able to do even more, now that we’re free. It’s all for Narnia.”

Aren't we all like that? Sometimes, only when we are pushed to achieve a certain goal then we realise that we were capable of doing that all along.... running alone, it feels that I have already reached my limit when I reached Novena... but somehow, in the past, when we were made to run endlessly in NPCC, to do the many drills in Vball, I survived through all that.. but yet, alone I don't seem to have the determination and strength to push myself on..

During Uni and in NIE, I could stay focused and complete my assignments and study even when ppl around me are watching variety shows or having fun... yet when my dad switches on the tv at home, I cant even concentrate on my marking...

Now that I am no longer pushed by expectations from my family... somehow it feels like I am drifting along aimlessly.. lacking the motivation to excel.. to reach greater heights.. now that I'm free from such expectations, should I be able to do more and to go further?

I no longer know what I want of life... but is tt a bad thing?? To not want anything from life.. and simply just being happy and contented with what I have achieved? Probably not...

Cuz I am happy.. :)

and until I find the motivation to strive for something that I badly want.. I shall remain, blissfully unmotivated... lol..

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Why can't you just be contented with what u have... Why must u always compare? What is the bloody use of that?!!! Sometimes I wonder why do i still try...

Saturday, October 20, 2012

长大是否就代表要学会把喜怒哀乐都藏的好好的。 当遇到挫折时， 无法分享。 快乐时，不能打从心底呐喊尖叫。 愤怒时，又无法努力的乱发脾气。 可能我曾经太擅长表达自己的情绪，所以往往会让人感到不自在。渐渐的，学者把情绪收了起来，也忘了要怎么说出自己的不开心了。

Sunday, July 29, 2012

eeks! realised that I haven't blogged in quite a while!! anyways, some nice photos to share... finally found some ukulele kakis!! And we have a mascot, her name's Nikko! :))



went to celebrate huimin's bdae last sunday and bought her a brand new ukulele! Sandy and Lisa also decided to purchase one since they were also interested in learning.. haha.. we almost couldn't get to the shop on time.. but luckily it closed only at 8, so we had about 15-20 mins of shopping for ukulele... we then went to the empty area between citylink and esplanade to be the main attraction for many tourists as we starting playing the ukulele.. hahaha.. so fun! :))

here's to hoping that our interests never wanes and for us to get better and better at playing the ukulele!! Many many more session ahead!! :))

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

went to tioman this time round, water vis not that awesome as compared to dayang in March... but it was still a good weekend getaway.. and we got to see turtle again amongst the other wonders of the sea.. :)) thinking of investing in a good camera and an underwater case for future trips, but was kinda scared that it's just another flash in the pan kinda interest for me.. :p we will see how it goes.. :D

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

What's the use of living if you live alone?

Had been feeling more and more emotional lately, particularly with the holidays approaching. I guess cuz that's when I start to feel empty, when I see that my colleagues are going overseas.. when I see my friends working.. and I start having this weird struggle with myself between wanting to be alone and wanting to go out with friends.. and sometimes when I go out with friends, I can't help but feel that I don't belong anywhere..

and that's when the darkness sets in..

Saturday, May 19, 2012

haven't blogged for quite some time already. Recently really couldn't find the energy, motivation or the time to stop, think and pen down my reflections for the day. I'm getting tired. Not of the students, but of all the endless chasing of homework, marking of substandard work, doing re-re-re-re-recorrections time and again, and on top of that, all the admin stuff needed to do...

just keyed in my students' grades for their SA1. they did pretty well for their mathematics, but not as well for their english.. maybe i'm really not suited to teach english.. I'm starting to doubt my ability more and more. There was once which I really thought that my english standard was considered to be pretty good... now, I just pray and hope that I will not ruin the students' grades for English.

maybe i'm just not as good at it as I thought I would be..

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Had a wonderful weekend!! Flew over to Sabah for a vball competition against the malaysian MOE team.. lost the match but at least I got the chance to play against them... quite an experience actually.. and I'm really glad that I've got the chance.. :p Was feeling extremely nervous though.. :( I think I really need to work on my mental strength.. I know I've got what it takes to play well.. but I need to work towards overcoming my own inferiority complex.. :x

Intially, I thought that all we will be doing in Sabah would be to compete in the games, then the rest of the time would be spent in the hotel (which by the way, was wayyyyy awesome!!) slacking... but our Malaysian counterparts were so friendly and hospitable.. they actually invited us to go island hopping with them after our match! We went to Pulau Manukan and Pulau Mamutik.. 2 very beautiful islands with crystal clear waters.. and the variety of fishes!! I think it's so much more than what I saw when I went scuba diving in Dayang! You are like literally swimming WITH the fishes!! I wanna bring my family there someday.. and I would want to go scuba diving there too! I think I'm beginning to fall in love with the underwater world.. hahaha.... can be the opposite version of the little mermaid.. hahaha.. and I guess we were pretty lucky... cuz only the vball girls team went snorkelling.. hahaha.. I think maybe the rest not so enthu to bring their Sporean counterparts to tour... see, vball rocks!

At night, we had a seafood dinner where we mingled with the Msian team of our respective sports... was really quite fun... and we had a good time getting to know each other.. I would really want to go again if I had the chance.. :)

again, photos are up on fb.. hahaha.. i'm getting lazier and lazier in posting photos up on my blog.. too time consuming.. :p

oh ya, btw, i can strike another item off my list!! I'm currently learning the Ukelele! So that falls under goal #6! :) and I may be attempting to climb Mt Kinabalu with my Vball teammates end of the year! hahaha.. I'm clearing the list at such a fast rate that I may need to set new targets for myself.. any suggestions?

1. complete 21K
2. complete 42K
3. go scuba diving
4. go skydiving
5. climb Mount Kinabalu
6. learn a new instrument (Ukelele)

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

just got back recently from my very first scuba-diving trip! :)



It was amazing! Learnt so much from the trip. Like the fact that about 60-80% of the earth's oxygen comes from the ocean and more than 70% of the sea creatures can be found in the corals! It's like the rainforest of the ocean! We went down to about 18m deep which was rather scary actually. Cuz it's like water all around you and you can hardly see the surface... and you know that there is no way to reach the surface on time if you ran out of oxygen or if anything happened.

I guess what kept me sane was the fact that our very experienced instructor was there... haha.. and he proved his expertise at one point when my buddy really ran out of air!! haha.. he took control of the situation so swiftly and calmly that we didn't have time to panic... then had to keep reminding myself to take deep calm breaths whenever I started to feel abit claustrophoic with the water pressing around me...

saw really amazing and colourful creatures that I usually only see in the underwater world at Sentosa... saw the clown fish, the sea anemone, bat fish, butterfly fish, barracudas (which can be pretty dangerous if they were out hunting), trigger fish (another dangerous species), cone shell (poisonous), a turtle, more than 13 cuttlefish and their eggs, and a few bat fish. The bat fish is really a very curious fish, it show absolutely no fear of us at all, and could swim up very closely to check out what we were doing! So cute!! Oh and we saw a deflated pufferfish as well!! (Photos all up on facebook... too lazy to post anything here anymore =p)

1. complete 21K
2. complete 42K
3. go scuba diving
4. go skydiving
5. climb Mount Kinabalu
6. learn a new instrument (guitar/piano?)

2 down! 4 more to go? :)

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

2 more days... and I will be on my way to strike off yet another item off my list of things to complete before I hit 30!!!

SCUBA-DIVING!!!! the pool session was already so fun!! Can't wait for the actual open water sessions!!!

*excited!!!*

oh ya, and I have decided that I would need to edit my list of things to do, such that they are actually attainable and within my control.. so here's the new list! :)

1. complete 21K
2. complete 42K
3. go scuba diving
4. go skydiving
5. climb Mount Kinabalu
6. learn a new instrument (guitar/piano?)

wonder what other new things are out there for me to try.. :D

Sunday, March 11, 2012

-[ JUST ME ]-

-[ SPEAK ]-

-[ THE QUOTES ]-

-[ NEW MANTRA ]-

我可能不會愛你 熟女魅力準則

-[ MY PAST ]-

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